Judith Hammond Durgin (aka Mrs. Durgin, Jude, and most importantly Meema ) , age 7 8 , passed away on Monday, July 16, 2018, at her camp on Loon Pond in Acton, Maine. Meema left her fa mily unexpectedly but peacefully. Meema was born on July 28, 1939, in Springvale, Maine . She shared her views on death, including obituaries, on several occasions. At her specific request , w e offer the following obituary….. Judith Hammond was born on July 28 th 1939 and died on July 16 th 2018. Judie loved her husband, children and grand children immensely. She had a very good life.  THE END .

Judie is survived by her loving husband of 58 years, Daniel C. Durgin, and by her four children, Jim and his wife Maryann Durgin, Jane Durgin and her partner Eric Herlan, Julie and her husband George Dow, and Jay and his wife Casey Durgin.  She is also survived by her sister MollieFeriend, and grand children Nicholas O'Brien and his wifeKatrina, Jacob Durgin, Carley O'Brien, Olivia Dow, Emily Durgin, Maeve Dow, Keira Durgin, Kyleigh Durgin and a host of family and friends.  Judie insisted that we must  beshort with her obituary because she knew she left us with so many great  memories (Judie LOVED fun and a good time).  In keeping with that sentiment, the family asks loved ones and friends to join Judie's immediate family with shared memories by visiting www.jspelkeyfumeralhome.com .

Thoughts on Jud ie Durgin

Bubbling up from all those stories was a picture of a woman who built a family and a home, grew that family beyond her own children, a nd then through the incredible pull of her larger than life personality, made sure that this extended family bonded tightly, in a manner intended to last long after she left.  Tears and stories from the day after she passed provided the best sign that she succeeded.

And what stories!  Husband Dan tells of meeting her on a blind date at her parents' house on King Street in Springvale.  There were hurdles, of course. Judie's mother, Jean, grilling him that night about just who he was! But Dan t ells of being totally smitten, with his first thought being "wow"!  It was love at first sight.  Boy was it ever.  A strong enough love that they eloped 6 months later, and Dan left college early to join the military.  They were off and running.

Boot camp in Texas, time in Tonawanda, near Buffalo.  A military posting to Greenland that would have separated Dan and Judie miraculously turning into assignment to England – thank goodness for the kindness of friends. No pl ace was better than England for the young couple, a fairytale start for their family.  While there, along came Jim (born 1961) and then Jane (born 1963), their first two children. And a friendship wi th Danny C ain that woul d last a lifetime.

They lived in England for three years, and then headed back to the states.  Dan pays tribute to the GI Bill – yes, a government program that did wonders for so many and helped get him through college.  They settled on Fernald Road, in Kittery, and then moved to Cook Street.  Along came Julie (born 19 67 ) and then Jay (born 1974 ).

They tell so many stories of growing up.  Judie made sure the family never sat still.  The kids were involved in sports, dance, boy scouts, Brownies, cheering, and of course school.  When a local little league organizer said that there was no room for a girls ' softball team in town , Judie spicefully said otherwise, organized the team with her friend Bea Paisley , moved it up as he r girls got older, and then the team won a state championship.  She never missed the activities her children were a part of.  Never.  She insisted that they finish what they started (they did) , and then she made s ure that she and Dan were there to watch it all unfold (they were).

There were bumps along the way, of course.  What Durgin child would not remember the day that Judie turned a pitcher of milk over on Dan's head at the dinner table? But as Dan said, he probably deserved it!  She knew no fear.  Ask Jay about her driving the old Mustang a hundred miles an hour ( true !) and then seeing how far it could coast after letting up on the gas.  Yes, telephone pol es really did look like a picket fence!

And speaking of fences, who do you think first located the space beneath the fence behind the Acton Fair ? You know, the space you can crawl under to get into the Fair for free?  Yes, that was Judie, pulling husband Dan along the way, and saving the cost of admission early in their marriage when money was tight.

Kids get married, and all four of the Durgin kids did.  Which in turn led to grandchildren. Lots o f them. In order, they are Nicholas , Jacob, Carley , Olivia, Emily, Maeve, Keira , and Kyleigh .  Nick and his wife Katrina added a great grandchild, Ellie, now three years old.

Judie's children and grandchildren tell stories that all meld together. Judie organizing birthday parties, Fourth of July events, Thanksgiving dinners, and Christmas celebrations. Each seemed bigger than the next.  But they shared a common theme.  The family had to be there.  All of them, and if you couldn't make it, she would remind you of all the others who were coming, and before long, everyone would decide they had better be there , or else!

She was the biggest cheerleader of all for her grandchildren.  She went to all their events, and reminded them over and over again how wonderful they were and how well they were doing.  She called Jacob every Friday night through much of high school and college, just to see how he was doing, and undoubtedly interrupting other activities on occasion.  But he knew her love, and how much she cared. Carley would always see her and Dan out in the crowd, watching them watching her.  Emily said the same.  They all did. If someone finished last in an event, it was still GREAT!  And "you will do better next time."  With Judie cheering you on, this was usually true!

Judie made sure there was always a camp on a lake where the family could spend summers together.  While there, she insisted year in and year out that she could still get up on the water skis.  She did it.  Of course! Maeve reminds us that Meema was afraid of heights, but when Maeve tugged he r up to the top floor of the Vdara Hotel in Las Vegas, she went, perhaps to show she could do it anyway. We couldn't figure out if this was before or after she got her shamrock tattoo on her ankle.   Age was no barrier for Judie Durgin.  Yes, she loved family photos, and in later years totally embraced all the new technologies, at least once Maeve would teach her how they all worked!

All of t his is how a family is made. Dinner by dinner and celebration by celebration. Reminding everyone they had to come.  And making sure that the get together was so rich and fulfilling, it just couldn't be missed.  Year in and year out, a cycle of family get togethers full of activity, applause, and shared memories. She treasured the photos, and sought out more.  She loved the Patriots, yes, but even more loved sharing the Patriots with the rest of the family – to the point of calling Olivia and Maeve in Las Vegas to find out what meal they were preparing for the upcoming game.

Dan, the children and grandchildren all laugh and cry remembering how Judie did it.  They recall the family trips after the children had grown and as the grandchildren grew.  These were vacations to Mexico, Florida, the Dominican Republic, and in Maine, to Point Lookout in Northport.  Judie made it happen.  She pulled the family away from their separate lives, brought them together to a place where they could be together as a family, and then let this rambunctious group of big strong people loose to play hard together.

What a night of memories.  What a reminder of how hard you have to work to build a family, to make each and every one see that they are part of that family whole.  Judie did it over and over again.  That seemed to be her goal and her mission.  And at the end of the day, she did it.  We were there.  Together.  Knowing we would continue to be.   This was a life well lived.  Not a life without difficulty.  But a life well done. She worked hard at what mattered, and succeeded better than most.

We all love her.  We will all miss her.  And hopefully we can do what she did, nearly as well.

Please, share your own thoughts with us.  It will mean so much to the whole family!